CCLaP: Death to the Bullshit Artists of South Texas, Vol. 1

Today, CCLaP is celebrating the birth of another book!

Our first handmade, hardback, hypermodern title of 2014 

Death to the Bullshit Artists of South Texas, Vol.1 

is now available to the public!

Death to the Bullshit Artists of South Texas, Vol. 1 was written by artist and Austinite Fernando A. Flores. This novella length collection of short stories showcases the tumultuous highs and lows of being in punk rock bands. It's edgy and endearing and bound to please lovers of rock-lit. 

McAllen, Texas is the indie-rock capital of the world; or at least it would be, if all their bands didn't have the pesky habit of disintegrating before ever having their first big success. That's the central premise of Austinite Fernando A. Flores' literary debut, and anyone who's ever pawned their guitar to buy more beer will find much in this book to celebrate. Working from the conceit that all acts of creativity are vital to human happiness, no matter what the public reaction, Flores presents a smorgasbord of interconnected tales about artists who can't quite seem to get their act together--from the performance artist whose most important work was only ever seen by five people, to the revered punk singer who never recorded a single album, to the bar band who accidentally become pawns of a local political campaign--and shows how in all these cases, the mere existence of these artists is a magical antidote against day-to-day ennui and adversity, and that it's actually the rest of the squares who are the true bullshit artists. By turns hilarious, heartbreaking and infuriating, this compact story collection is a loving ode to small-town music scenes in all their messy glory, and a welcome slap in the face to our "Yes We Can" times.

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Check out what others think so far:

Scott Navicky, whose book Humboldt, or the Power of Positive Thinking, was released by CCLaP last month had this to say: "While Flores’ stories are primarily about music, they’re not about the glamorous side of the music industry. They’re not about fortune and fame, national tours, magazine spreads, groupies, or champagne brunches. They’re about people who live in trailer parks, work dead-end jobs, and drink too much too early in the day. Flores captures this [collective feeling of being in a band] perfectly."

Goodreads user Bradley Gamboa says: "Death to the Bullshit Artists of South Texas Vol. 1 ... is not just a collection of short stories about the indie punk scene in South Texas. It is a ode to any one who has ever seen joy in listening, watching, or creating works of art anywhere! "

Lixian of Words, Notes, and Fiction says: " The rock star life tends to be too romanticized while Flores seems to make it as gritty, sweaty, dirty, and dark as possible ... it's not cookies and milk, it's chainsaws and nails...."

Goodreads user Woodland Animal shares his thoughts: "Flores presents a smorgasbord of interconnected tales about artists who can't quite seem to get their act together...By turns hilarious, heartbreaking and infuriating, this compact story collection is a loving ode to small-town music scenes in all their messy glory..."

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Read more about the book and Fernando 

in this interview between the author and Hypertext Magazine

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Death to the Bullshit Artists of South Texas, Vol. 1 can be downloaded for free at the publisher's page.  If you prefer print, you can purchase it as a gorgeous, hardback, handmade hypermodern collectors book there too. 

The Concrete Killing Fields Blog Tour

[The wonderful folks over at JKS Communications reached out to me about hosting a leg of The Concrete Killing Fields blog tour. As someone who puts together blog tours both  professionally as CCLaP's Marketing Director, and out of my sheer love of literature as a blogger, there was no way I was going to pass up the opportunity to help spread the word about Pat Morgan's small press memoir.]

In today's day and age, it is so easy to become a published author. If you are ever in doubt, just take a look at this blog post by Chuck Wendig. So it's no longer a matter of "Will my book ever get published?" The question is, "Do I want to be traditionally published?" Pat Morgan took some time to share her journey from manuscript to finished product, the hard work she had to put into it, and the people she pulled in to end up with a memoir she could be proud of:

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When I was invited to write this essay about “putting a book together,” my first question was “should it be about writing the book, editing the book, or getting it published?” Five minutes later the response read “I think getting published would be a good focus!”  “Oh, great,” I muttered, “now I’ll have to write about how ignorant I was about publishing and how much there still is to learn and how much time it takes and how hard it can be.” But then I thought “so what? This essay has a happy ending.”

It was way past time for me to get serious about getting published. My manuscript was finished—again. I’d basically re-written it at least twice, trying to find a balance between what I wanted the reader to know about the people I had written about, including myself, and what any potential readers might actually want to know. It had been painful at times since I’d written about some of the homeless people who stole my heart and broke it. Too, I’d read that if you write about yourself, you need to be willing to “open a vein.” I’d gone further, I think, and maybe hit an artery a couple of times since what I’d written about why I felt so connected to homeless people seemed to come in spurts. I’d been to a few conferences for writers and “wannabee” writers and twice I’d come home thinking I’d struck gold but neither of those opportunities to land a publisher had panned out. I’d learned a lot, though and even deleted some of the “get even” chapters after I read half a dozen books about how to write a memoir. Finally, I’d edited my manuscript until my eyes crossed and I could almost recite it verbatim. My literary friends had edited it as well, some of them a couple of times. I’d fulfilled my lifelong dream of writing a book but it had taken so long that getting it published was now on my “bucket” list.

I was well aware that thousands of people have self-published books and many of them have done well but for several reasons, that didn’t matter to me. I wanted a top-quality product and the credibility, the “good housekeeping seal of approval” that comes, rightly or wrongly, by having my first book published by someone who publishes books for a living. It hadn’t occurred to me that I could be that publisher until I signed up with a brilliant, bossy “book shepherd” who teaches and helps people become independent book publishers so they can turn out a quality product and make far more money than they can make by having their book(s) published by a traditional publisher.

All the editing that had been done before I sent it to the “smart, sassy, salty” woman who would quickly become my “book shepherd” clearly paid off. Other than a lot of sentences that were a full paragraph long (which is how we speak and write in the south) she and her chief editor said my manuscript was “clean” which made it easier for them to work with me. My willingness to be open to edits by professional editors who did a lot more than catch typos and incorrect punctuation marks helped as well. What I especially liked, even though it was a lot of work, was the way she and her chief editor worked with me to be sure that we were on the same page (literally and figuratively) with their edits and that those edits were compatible with what I was trying to communicate. (By this time, it had become clear to me and my book shepherd that I lacked the technical skills—and the motivation—to become an independent publisher and she had agreed to be my publisher as well as my book shepherd.

When we finished our marathon rounds of editing, the book then went to “layout.” There a computer genius converted the manuscript into a more easily readable font and fit the entire manuscript, including the endorsements, acknowledgements, afterword, and table of contents into the form and size of the book. Then we edited it again, and edited the edits that had been incorporated until we agreed that it was as close to perfect as it could be (within reason).  

While all this was going on, my publisher was working to get the best people—and prices—for the book cover, paper, printer, distributor, etc. She was also “encouraging” me to get top-notch endorsements for the book, write the acknowledgements, the afterword, and my personal information for the cover—and venture into the world of social media—an absolute must for marketing. That it all came together at the same time is a testament to her persistence and professionalism.

One of the things I learned along the way is that traditional publishers, which are corporations, may not even like some of the books they publish. If the book will sell well enough to make money, the traditional publisher likes—and gets—most of the money. Conversely, the small independent press that published my book wants me (the author) to make the lion’s share of the money. I like that even though my goal in writing the book and getting it published wasn’t to make a lot of money. My goal was to keep my promise to tell the stories of the people I loved and lost to the concrete killing fields of homelessness. In doing so, I hoped, and still hope, that readers will understand why they were homeless, why some of us are so driven to help them, and what we need to do to break the cycle of homelessness in our communities—and our country.

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Pat Morgan is a self-confessed political junkie and “Arkansas Traveler” veteran of the Clinton for President, and Clinton-Gore campaigns. She is also a mostly unsuccessful political candidate (won 1, lost 2), a former elected official in county government, an unabashed policy wonk, and relentless (ask anybody who knows her) advocate for effective services, especially mental health care, and housing for homeless people.

Book Giveaway: Kelly Davio's BURN THIS HOUSE

Since July 2010, TNBBC has been bringing authors and readers together every month to get behind the book! This unique experience wouldn't be possible without the generous donations of the authors and publishers involved.

It's the first of the month and you know what that means.

It's time to bring you April's Author/Reader Discussion book!

We will be reading and discussing Burn This House

with poet Kelly Davio

Kelly and her publisher Red Hen Press are giving us a total of 10 copies to giveaway. 

A mish mosh of PDF (open internationally) and print copies (open to US only)

Here's the Goodreads description to whet your appetite:

In her debut poetry collection, Kelly Davio invites the reader into a world where sin is virtue and virtue is vice, where the ominous lingers just beneath the surface, and the everyday is imbued with the fantastic. In these intelligent, compassionate, and harrowing poems, Davio gives a modern voice to metaphysical tradition. The poems in this collection dismantle the specter and judgment of a life shaded by Judeo-Christian religious consciousness. Grounded in Davio’s radical religious childhood and subsequent break with the church, her writing examines the world from the viewpoint of the spiritual dissenter, questioning the mores and motivations of religion, family, and self. In sections that explore concepts of revelation, sin, and virtue, these poems tilt the world at uncharacteristic angles, revealing the ragged edges at the margins of belief. At times solemn, at times exuberant, Burn This House is an intense volume, its darkness lit by the flames of wit, intellect, and curiosity.

This giveaway will run through March 8th. 

Winners will be announced here and via email on March 9th.

Here's how to enter:

1 - Leave a comment here or in the giveaway thread over at TNBBC on goodreads, stating why you'd like to receive a copy of the book. You MUST be a resident of the US to win a paper copy, so please state your preference and where you reside.

ONLY COMMENT ONCE. MULTIPLE COMMENTS DO NOT GAIN YOU ADDITIONAL CHANCES TO WIN.

2 - State that you agree to participate in the group read book discussion that will run from April 20th through April 26th. Kelly Davio has agreed to participate in the discussion and will be available to answer any questions you may have for her. 

 *If you are chosen as a winner, by accepting the copy you are agreeing to read the book and join the group discussion at TNBBC on Goodreads (the thread for the discussion will be emailed to you before the discussion begins). 

 3 - Your comment must have a way to contact you (email is preferred). 

GOOD LUCK!!

Book Review: The Mustache He's Always Wanted But Could Never Grow

Read 2/22/14 - 2/27/14

3 Stars - Recommended to those who enjoy reading about the downward swirl of bottom-rung humanity in the toilet of life

101 Pages

Publisher: House of Vlad Productions

Released 2013

Brian Alan Ellis doesn't have much hope for the human race. He doesn't see us in vivid technicolor. Rather, to him, humanity is drenched in darkness, hidden in shadow, and exuding guilt and sin. 

Scraping the absolute bottom of the barrel, we find him shining a light on the squirmy, dirty, shifty souls he discovers buried down there. Fetishists, a dead cat, drunkards, the cripplingly depressed, and self-mutilators all cling together and hang separately in this collection of short (and shorter) stories. 

In my opinion, the stories that bookend the collection - Crumbs of Love and The Sailboat/Hatchet Painting - are the strongest of the bunch. In the former, you have a dude sitting on the couch, absolutely in love with life and his girlfriend. When he opens his mouth to tell her this, she jumps down his throat and shatters his feel-good buzz. She's a bitch, this chick, and we can see it plain as day. But our poor ole dude is so love-struck, and now so panic-stricken at the thought of her not loving him nearly as much as he loves her, we just can't help but shake our heads. Cause we've all been there. At some point, we've all been sitting exactly where he sits, mouth agape with stupid ridiculous semi-blubbering shit driveling out of our mouths. In the latter, we meet two people (pretty sure they are brother and sister) chatting away meaninglessly about what's been going on in their lives. We learn about the sister's second ex-husband who used to crash at the brother's apartment (before the sister met and married him). The guy was an artist and we're given the rundown on the rumored sale of his one and only masterpiece - an unremarkable painting of a sailboat with a hatchet stuck through it that contained some remarkable "ingredients". 

Stories like Eulogy for Johnny Thunders, which is about a dude, his ex-girlfriend, and her mother standing graveside in varying degrees of mourning over the untimely death of their cat; Leftover Heels, about the pair of shoes an ex-girlfriend leaves behind and the things one lonely man does with them; Lunch Lady, where a husband has a bad reaction to his wife's new 'do; and Delia Done Wrong, where a guy who planned to cheat on his girlfriend while she's away on a trip gets what he wants, and worse, hold their own and help to set the tone of the remainder of the collection. 

Not all of the stories reach that same caliber, though. I started and then stopped reading For Pain with Sleeplessness and Loco Mask II because they just weren't grabbing me. And for all the awesomeness of its title, while The Mustache He's Always Wanted But Could Never Grow was short and well written, it was simultaneously disappointing. 

For all their faults, Ellis doesn't paint his characters in a poor light. He isn't asking for your pity. He's simply pulling back the sheet and saying "see, see this stinking, festering wound of a human here? see how handsome he can be?", bringing the ugliness of human nature to the surface so it too can find its moment in the sun.

Sue Lange Takes it to the Toilet

Oh yes! We are absolutely running a series on bathroom reading! So long as it's taking place behind the closed  (or open, if that's the way you swing) bathroom door, we want to know what it is. It can be a book, the back of the shampoo bottle, the newspaper, or Twitter on your cell phone - whatever helps you pass the time...


Today, author Sue Lange takes it to the toilet. Sue has two published works of speculative fiction satire. Her first novel, Tritcheon Hash, was republished as an ebook by Book View Cafe in 2011, and was included in Kirkus’ best of list for that year. Her second novel, We, Robots, was included in io9′s 13 Stories that will change the way you look at Robots list. Her latest novel, The Perpetual Motion Club, is a trek into the Young Adult/Sci Fi genre. Her short fiction has bee published in Futures (Nature), Adbusters, Apex Digest of Science Fiction and Horror, and elsewhere.

Sue Lange's Bathroom Reading Experience

I just moved to an apartment. The bathroom is too small for reading. Serious reading takes a lot of space and accouterments. You can’t just crowd onto a rug in the corner or under the sink. Not if you’re reading big stuff like I read.

 The bathroom in my old house had a lot of space. There I had a throne, a bidet, a basin, a claw-foot tub, and a stand-alone shower. That was a proper reading room. This what I got here is just a travesty.

 Back when I was a queen and had a real bathroom, I read on the throne as well as while taking a good soak in the tub. My choice of reading material depended on which of the two stations I was working in.

 The toilet was reserved for hardcore material. I’m talking non-fiction, not pornography. Hardcore non-fiction includes things like software manuals, farming how-tos, political manifestos from the days when communism was still a viable philosophy. It was stuff that made you think. And you had to think to get through it. Only while dropping a dense load can you tackle such a dense load.

 I had to sell my house before I got to the instruction manual for the VCR, but that turned out alright because I had to sell the VCR too.

My escape to the tub included sensuous material, as befits a sensual activity. Proust and Colette were favorites. For more modern material, I’d turn to Swamplandia. Perfect for a water environment. The crocodile wrestling really came alive for me in the tub. If you’re going to try this yourself, I’d suggest adding some lily pads for authenticity. A frog or salamander wouldn’t hurt.

The Indie Ink Runs Deep: Jason Helford

Every now and then I manage to talk a small press author into showing us a little skin... tattooed skin, that is. I know there are websites and books out there that have been-there-done-that already, but I hadn't seen one with a specific focus on the authors and publishers of the small press community. Whether it's the influence for their book, influenced by their book, or completely unrelated to the book, we get to hear the story behind their indie ink....


Today's ink story comes from Jason Helford. Jason has written two books: Written in Hell and From a Killer’s Mind. He’s a devoted husband and father, an avid comic book collector and an enthusiastic craft beer drinker. Prizing originality and creativity more than anything else, some of his favorite authors are Hunter S. Thompson, Chuck Palahniuk, Ray Bradbury, Terry Brooks, Margaret Weis, Tracy Hickman, Robert Asprin and Albert Camus. Please don’t be offended if you are an author and your name wasn’t mentioned, he probably likes you, too. He lives in Maryland with his wife, Bella, his daughter, Maddie, and his goofy dog, Sunset.

I got my first tattoo last summer, at the age of 37.  The desire to get one was much, much older than that, but there was always a reason to wait.  Will my wife think less of me?  How will Mom react?  I’m a dad now, so is it the right call?  Why get one when I’m already so far into my 30’s?  Sure, they are cool, but what do I want on my body for the rest of my life?  After a couple seasons of watching tattoo reality shows with the wife, I decided my interest was deep enough to test the waters, and get some answers to the questions that had been holding me back.  The answers surprised me a little.  The wife was on-board, as long as it was something with meaning, and it was done by a good artist.  My mom told me she loves tattoos—who knew?!  My daughter told me, “Wow, Daddy, that sounds really cool!  Get one!”  And as for what I want on my body?  Easy.  Family and comic book art.  And so, in a matter of a few days, years of excuses and fears melted away, and the planning began.

I spent a number of months planning it out, and sketching up ideas.  After a while, I came up with my basic tattoo premise: the idea of a family crest, utilizing Thor’s hammer, Mjolnir, and his winged helm.  My family is a family of collectors, and Thor happens to be my favorite comic book, so it was an easy choice once I settled on an idea.  I replaced Thor’s name on Mjolnir with my family name, to start the conversion to a personal crest.  The quill is to denote my life as a writer, and I used a black stork quill-feather to further bolster that theme, since it symbolizes creativity.  The runic words below the helm are written in Anglo-Saxon runes, and read Maddie and Bella, my daughter and wife.  I asked the tattoo artist to use Anglo-Saxon runes to give a nod to my mother’s side of the family, while still sticking with the Viking theme of Thor’s hammer and helm.  The ‘S’ in the leather strap hanging from Mjolnir’s handle is for my step-father and step-sister, standing for Safford.  I took the idea, and a basic sketch, to Dave Waugh at Jinx Proof Tattoo in Washington DC, and he changed around the composition, drew something up that was much better than I could ever produce, and put this awesome tattoo on my shoulder.  My daughter loves it, my wife definitely doesn’t think less of me, and I’m looking forward to number two at some point soon.

Tom Williams's Would You Rather

Bored with the same old fashioned author interviews you see all around the blogosphere? Well, TNBBC's newest series is a fun, new, literary spin on the ole Would You Rather game. Get to know the authors we love to read in ways no other interviewer has. 

This version of Would You Rather features some unique questions in support of Curbside Splendor's blog tour for Tom Williams's new release Don't Start Me Talkin':

Tom Williams's

Would You Rather

Would you rather be a comic or a musician?

 

Both vocations either attract tortured geniuses or turn ordinary people into tortured geniuses but a comic might have to appear on the Bob and Tom Show to promote his appearance at the Funny Bone in Waco. I'll take musician.

Would you rather be yourself and live your life with your flaws exposed, or an invented self, though nobody would know who you truly were?

 

Invented self. I don't know who I truly am, so what's the diff if nobody else does?

Would you rather be Brother Ben, the performer, or Mr. Mabry, the manager?

 

Brother Ben. Wilton Mabry has one path to follow; Brother Ben has many. I made him up and still haven't tracked him down fully.

Would you rather live in a world without music or a world without books?

 

You guys aren't making this easy. I guess it would be a world without music. I do, even in a time with music on my phone, in my car, on my computer, go without it for days at time. But a day without a book? Even to check the spelling of a word or to re-read a sentence I already know by heart? I couldn't imagine it. I think every writer who watched the Twilight Zone (which is every writer I know) shudders at the thought of that episode with Burgess Meredith, "Time Enought at Last," where just as he prepares to read all his books his glasses shatter. Yeah, I could hum and pat my knees for rhythm. A world without books, nah. Can't deal with that.

Would you rather “tell everything you know” or stay silent?

There's no room for compromise in Would You Rather, is there? Okay. I'd rather "tell everything I know" because I have been for a long time silent about a lot. I wonder if that's not the whole enterprise for me as a writer, though: holding in the words until they're all ready to spill on the page.

 

 

Would you rather play harp or guitar?

I currently play guitar badly, so I'll opt for harp. You can carry it in your pocket, nobody's going to bang you over the head with it. And on the roads traveled by bluesmen, a hasty retreat can often be for the best.

You’ve mentioned that you deal with race differently as an biracial person. Would you rather be mixed racial or a single race?

 

I'm just going to shut up now. I could carp and say nobody's really a "single race," but then I'd not be playing the game right. And the answer is, sure, I'd rather be mixed, just because it's the best of both worlds, even if I've made a career out of feeling ambivalent about it.

Would you rather be a well known author now or be considered a literary genius after you’re dead?

 

NOW, NOW, NOW. You can't get on Oprah after you're dead!

Would you rather write a book without using conjunctions or have every sentence of your book begin with one?

But why this false dilemma? And is this the right question? Or should we consider that . . . I could go on. Every sentence begins with one.

Would you rather write a plot twist you hated or write a character you hated?

 

Plot twist. I don't even know if I know how to do a plot twist. Seriously. And characters one hates--I don't think that's possible for me. I really do like them all.

Would you rather have schools teach your book or ban your book?

 

Ban, of course. If you want to see a young reader's eyes glaze over, tell her this book will be on her English IV syllabus.

Would you rather be reduced to speaking only in haiku or be capable of only writing in haiku?

 

Speaking. I'm inscrutable already. This would be a natural progression into incoherence.

Would you rather critics rip your book apart publicly or never talk about it at all?

 

"The only thing worse than being talked about," Oscar Wilde tells us, "is not being talked about."

Would you rather give up your computer or pens and paper?

Pens and paper. How can you look up Oscar Wilde quotes on your Bic?

 

 

Would you rather have everything you think automatically appear on your Twitter feed or have a voice in your head narrate your every move?

 

I already have the voice in my head thing. Doesn't everyone?

Would you rather read a book that is written poorly but has an excellent story, or read one with weak content but is written well? 

 

We have become a bunch of word-squeezers, haven't we? And you know, I've put aside plenty of books, but never because they didn't soar in every sentence; it was because there was no story.We want both, of course, and get that a lot. But yeah, give me story every time.

Would you rather read naked in front of a packed room or have no one show up to your reading?

 

Read naked. I've already had the other experience.

Would you rather have one giant bestseller or a long string of moderate sellers?

 

I think the one giant bestseller would be freeing. You could just start throwing things around that you mightn't have considered before.

Would you rather have every word of your favorite novel tattooed on your skin or always playing as an audio in the background for the rest of your life?

 

I like tats and prefer short novels, So, yeah, sure. Book me an appointment and get out my copy of The Moviegoer.

Would you rather become a character in your novel or have your characters escape the page and reenact the novel in real life?

 

Let the characters escape. I'm not too interesting. I'd barely be worthy of a walk on role.

Would you rather write without using punctuation and capitalization or without using words that contained the letter E?

 

Of the two constraints, the one that strikes me as most useful is the avoiding words with "E." Punctuation and Capitalization are both too crucial to the construction of everything. It would be like taking out mortar or bone.

Would you rather write an entire novel standing on your tippy-toes or laying down flat on your back?

Tippy-toes. I'd be better able to see what might be coming next. 

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Tom Williams's newest book of fiction, the novel Don't Start Me Talkin', is on shelves and available through Amazon, Barnes and Noble now. He lives in Kentucky with his wife, Carmen Edington, and their son.

The Audio Series: Craig Wallwork

Our audio series "The Authors Read. We Listen." is an incredibly special one for us. Hatched in a NYC club during BEA week, this feature requires more work of the author than any of the ones that have come before. And that makes it all the more sweeter when you see, or rather, hear them read excerpts from their own novels, in their own voices, the way their stories were meant to be heard.


Today, Craig Wallwork reads an excerpt from his bizarro chapbook Gory Hole: A Horror Triple Bill. At the age of 10 years old, all Craig Wallwork wanted to be was a zombie. Spending most of his time shuffling from room to room, hiding in closets, and petrifying his neighbours, one sunny afternoon in 1982 Craig decided to consume 5lbs of raw mince meat and a bag of chopped liver from his parent's refrigerator. Two hours later it became apparent that he did not have the stomach for the zombie lifestyle, nor the money to pay for a new bathroom carpet. In this volume of short stories, Craig returns to his dream of living within a world inhabited by zombies, where normal people can consume meat without fear of contracting E. coli, and surviving the night means having a loaded gun and a stomach for the grotesque. Craig Wallwork is the author of the novels, The Sound of Loneliness, To Die Upon a Kiss and the short story collection, Quintessence of Dust. 

Click on the Soundcloud link to experience Human Tenderloin from the Gory Hole chapbook, as read by author Craig Wallwork:





The word on Gory Hole:

GORY HOLE is a triple feature of grindhouse-esque short fiction by Craig Wallwork. Billing includes: "Revenge of the Zombie Pussy Eaters", "Human Tenderloin", and "Sicko". 

“Like a grindhouse version of Grimm’s Fairy Tales, Wallwork’s fiction is smart, innovative, and a hell of a lot of fun.” —Carlton Mellick III

“There’s a place where intelligence and weirdness meet, and Wallwork’s prose is comfortably nestled there, feeding off both with the keenness of a crazed tapeworm. Sharp, nasty, and bizarre, GORY HOLE is a perfect treat for those who like their fiction unique and with heaping sides of humor and gore.” —Gabino Iglesias

“When your laughter turns to tears, saline to bloody rivulets, you have found GORY HOLE by Craig Wallwork. A master storyteller, this trio of black comedy is lyrical prose dipped in deviant lust dusted with violent retribution—for the horror fan in us all.” - Richard Thomas, author of Staring Into the Abyss.
*lifted with love from goodreads

Book Review: American Monster

Read 2/15/14 - 2/22/14

2.5 Stars - Recommended Lightly to fans of bizarro (because it's not quite bizarro enough) but should do nicely for straight up futuristic sci-fi fans.

332 Pages

Publisher: Lazy Fascist Press

Released: Feb 2014

I am huge fan of Lazy Fascist Press and admire the kinds of literature they publish and support. Every book they release looks and sounds amazing. They are one of the few small presses I endlessly solicit review copies from, unable to keep from drooling over the opportunity to be one of the first to read each title. 

More often than not, their titles blow me away. Like, grab me by the throat with their words and choke me so hard I see stars (metaphorically, of course. Wouldn't it be cool if there were books out there that could actually make you see stars?!). Every once and a little while, though, I find myself reading one that's just... meh. There's nothing wrong with it exactly; it just seems to be missing that extra something that makes me go WOW.

And maybe that's not fair to the book. It's not the book's fault that I set the bar too high, you know. Maybe, right from the get-go, I set the book up for failure because I had these unrealistic notions of what the book would be, assigning it this totally unattainable goal of being my kind of awesome when it was never meant for me in the first place. 

Such is the case with JS Breukelaar's American Monster. It looks all kinds of awesome. It sounds all kinds of awesome. But it's just not my kind of awesome. 

Taking place in a futuristic California that has effectively removed itself from the United States, a being known as NORMa (a network operation requiring minimal access) is on the hunt for the ultimate human horn. Finding and tagging the horn is her one and only ticket home. 

Norma isn't quite sure what she is - she looks human, and she certainly feels human, though there are parts to her that are otherworldly - and the longer she remains on earth searching for the elusive 'perfect' horn, the more determined she is to understand, and ultimately ignore, her mission. Her "Mommy", a body-less planetary consciousness of sorts, is a source of constant pressure and pain for her, demanding that Norma find an equivalent to the one Mommy let go all those years ago. 

There are so many things happening here, on so many levels. 

First, we've got a woman (part alien? part robot? part daemon? maybe a bit of all three mixed together? I never did get that part figured out) who can change her sex (she actually started out as a male named NORM when Mommy first created her) and carries some sort of tagging device in her dentata (erm, a curious term for her "vagina like hole") that is meant to be passed on/into the human horn (I'll let you take one guess) of her choosing. So basically, Norma is a horny, otherworldly being who is being driven around California by her semi-insatiable libido. 

Aaand, she's got major Mommy issues. Mommy can communicate with her, and keep tabs on her, through all sorts of mangled technology - consoles, cell phones, anything electronic - though she can also, sometimes, squeeze her way into Norma's mind and cause her physical pain when she disobeys or when Mommy fears she is prolonging her hunt for THE horn. At first, Norma wants to make Mommy happy, but she quickly begins to devise ways to shut Mommy out, or at least impede her awareness a bit, as she desperately tries to come up with a Plan B. And this makes Mommy mad. 

So yeah, there's some sex, and a whole lot of dentata-and-horn-talk, but there are also some pretty rad characters like her cross dressing BFF Bunny and the young, badass homeless girl Raye and her psychotic father Mac, who dreams of being Michael Jackson. Not to mention Gene, a gigantic bull of a man who falls hard for Norma and manages to keep her somewhat grounded when she feels as though she is spinning wildly out of control. And boy do things get wild and out of control. 

I found myself confused pretty early on - as to what was going on and why it was going on - and that feeling of 'not quite knowing' followed me about half way through the book. At the midpoint, things finally seemed to start sliding into place and I found that the pace of the book actually began to pick up. I was more interested in what was going on between the characters and had a better grasp on the overall story. Sure, there were moments here and there in the second half that left me just as confused as I had been in the beginning (if not more so)  but I was able to quickly get myself back on track and moving along again with the action.

My final verdict?  American Monster was just a tad too weird and otherwordly for me. Though it sounded like it would be right up my alley, it took too many left and right turns and lost me somewhere waaaaay back there. I really had a difficult time letting the story just whisk me away. 

This one is on me, you guys. It's totally all on me. 

CCLaP: Humboldt, or The Power of Positive Thinking

Six days ago, CCLaP released Humboldt, or The Power of Positive Thinking. 

Not only does it have the honor of being our first release of 2014, 

but it is also our first-ever, full length, widely distributed paperback!!!

Humboldt was written by debut author Scott Navicky and is a creative, satirical spin on Voltaire's Candide. The main character, Humboldt, is a bit of a dim bulb (think Forrest Gump) with a knack for dumb luck. It's cheeky and challenging, and unlike anything CCLaP has put out before.

The Iraq War? The housing market collapse? College football's concussion crisis? How can anyone be expected to understand such complexities, especially a "horticulturally dyslexic" farmboy with an eighth-grade education and a penchant for perpetually misunderstanding, misreading, and misinterpreting the world? Born on a farm in Ohio, Humboldt is content to spend his life "outside amongst the oxygen and unhurried hydrocarbons." But when his father's farm is threatened with foreclosure, Humboldt is forced to save it by enrolling in college, leading him on an epic absurdist adventure through Washington politics, New York performance art, Boston blue-bloods, post-Katrina New Orleans, multiple murders, and holy resurrections. Mixing the speed and structure of Voltaire's Candide with a heavy dose of Joycean wordplay, and a love of literary acrobatics worthy of David Foster Wallace, Scott Navicky's debut novel assails some of modern America's most cherished beliefs and institutions with the battle cry: "Ticklez l'infame!"

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The book brought in some great reviews so far

Like this one from Abby over at Chicago Literati:  ..."moving along at breakneck pace, every chapter reads like an episode in a great screwball comedy from the days of yore. One-half Forrest Gump and one-half Zeppo Marx, the titular hero is unlike any you’ve read before or are likely to read again, and that’s fantastic."

And this one from Monika of A Lovely Bookshelf on the Wall: "I was reminded of Candide, A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court, the naiveté of Don Quixote, and maybe even a bit of Monty Python. "

Katie, from Words for Worms describes the books as: ..."If A Confederacy of Dunces and Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas had a moderately dimwitted but incredibly lucky love child..."

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You can read more about Scott and the book in this interview with Chicago Literati

and get behind the book with his Research Notes, which appeared over at Necessary Fiction.

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And listen to Scott Navicky as he reads excerpts from the book:

(be sure to view on its youtube page to see more excerpts!)

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Humboldt, or the Power of Positive Thinking can be downloaded for free at its publisher's page (and a really super-cool annotated version will be available soon, for those of you who want more behind-the-scenes "footage" as you read), or purchased as a gorgeous paperback! Of course, the book is also available as a handmade, hypermodern hardback, but due to its size and length will cost you a pretty penny more than those we've sold in the past. 

Indie Spotlight: Alan M Clark

Being a reader is kind of awesome. No matter what your particular tastes, no matter what your particular mood, you can always find the perfect book to whisk you away. Sometimes you want to get lost in a far away future. Other times, you want to be swept off your feet by a romance. Maybe you want a good ole horror story to scare the bejesus outta you. Or, maybe you just want to be pulled back into simpler days...

And if it's the past that's calling your name, well, author Alan M Clark has a guest post that'll be right up your alley. His latest novel, The Door That Faced West is an "early western" that takes place right at the turn of the 19th century. Today, he shares an essay that breaks down the differences between Westerns and his novel. Check it out and then check out his novel... (oh, and by the way, he is also an illustrator, look at those weapons he whipped up!)

THE DOOR THAT FACED WEST

an early western

Because most Westerns take place in the mid-to late 1800s, I have described my new novel, The Door that Faced West, as an Early Western since the majority of the story takes place in the years 1799 and 1800, when most of the continent of North America had yet to be explored and the western frontier was in the new states of Tennessee, Kentucky, and Georgia.

Besides the obvious geographical dissimilarity, here are some differences between most Westerns and what I’m referring to as an Early Western:

1) Instead of the trusty 6-shooter or repeating rifle of most Westerns, in an Early Western all firearms are single-shot weapons. Loading these pistols and rifles, mostly flintlocks, takes a minimum of 15 seconds. As a result, much of the violence in an Early Western occurs hand to hand.

2) While most gunmen in Westerns carry only 1 pistol and a few carry 2, in an Early Western it’s not unlikely for a dangerous man to carry 4 pistols or more.

3) Most of the characters in Westerns have an American accent of some sort, whereas many of the characters in an Early Western have accents more like those of their European forbears.

4) In Westerns, the common mode of travel is horseback riding. In an Early Western, because most of the territory is heavily forested, folks get about on the poorly maintained trails faster on foot and horses are reserved for carrying supplies.

5) In most Westerns, the Indians are Plains Indians or from tribes further west, and they ride horses, but in an early western, the Indians are of the woodland variety and mostly get about on foot or by floating waterways.

Here are some similarities between Westerns and Early Westerns:

1) In both Westerns and Early Westerns, law an order is loosely established in frontier territories, and adjacent vast wilderness areas have no law and order, communication between isolated settlements is poor, and large criminal fraternities spring up along well-used trails and waterways to prey upon those using the avenues for commerce.

2) In both Westerns and Early Westerns, the inhabitants of frontier towns are those seeking a new start for either good or bad reasons.  Some are taking the opportunity to build a new home, carving a life out of the virgin wilderness that they can claim as their own, while others are escaping prosecution for crimes they committed in the East. The latter are often in hiding, having assumed new identities or at least new persona, and some of them maintain ties with criminal fraternities. Therefore the former, generally law-abiding folks, frequently are unaware of the rogue character of their neighbors.

3) Both Westerns and Early Westerns present wild settings and clumsy, young, and growing societies that are ripe with possibilities for drama.

The images of pistols with this post helps illustrate the difference 51 years can make in the development of firearms.  The one on the left is a typical flintlock pistol that might have been used in the period in which The Door that Faced West takes place. The one on the right is a pistol from 1851, such as might be used in a Western. The tomahawk in the middle is the preferred weapon of the deadliest character in The Door that Faced West, Micajah Harpe.

Other examples of what I would consider Early Western novels are the Leatherstocking tales, including Last of the Mohicans, by James Fenimore Cooper.

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Alan M. Clark grew up in Tennessee in a house full of bones and old medical books. He has a Bachelor of Fine Arts from the San Francisco Art Institute. His illustrations have appeared in books of fiction, non-fiction, textbooks, young adult fiction and children's books. Awards for his illustration work include the World Fantasy Award and four Chesley Awards. He is the author of thirteen books, including seven novels, a lavishly illustrated novella, four collections of fiction, and a nonfiction full-color book of his artwork. His latest novel, The Door That Faced West, is an Early Western that takes place in Tennessee and Kentucky in 1799-1800. www.alanmclark.com